Parenting is an all-consuming project
Parenting is an activity that requires us
to involve every aspect of our being.
It is mental, emotional, physical
and deeply spiritual experience.
It is ecstatic and challenging at the same time.
It can test us to our very core
and lift us up higher than we knew was possible.
Navigating all of this is truly a major task.
Conscious parenting is doubly challenging
Adding on to that trying to be as conscious, positive
and nurturing as possible to our children
makes it even more challenging.
A duel to the death
Any task that we perform becomes easier
if our tools are higher quality.
In fixing a car or playing sports or doing any kind of art form
the tools you have can make a big difference
to the quality of the outcome.
For example in the old days when samurai would
duel to the death the victory was not always
decided by skill, speed or strength.
Victory was decided by who had the better sword
Often it was decided purely on the basis
of who had the better quality sword.
If your sword cost $200 and mine cost $2000
there was a better chance that I would slice you in half.
Parenting is much the same.
It may not be a duel to the death,
but it does often feel like it!
The sword of parenting must be strong, flexible and sharp
Therefore if our sword is strong and flexible and sharp
we have a much better chance at emerging victorious.
The difference between the dueling samurai and conscious parenting is
that in the duel your opponent ends up dead,
in parenting the other party, our kids,
end up being enriched and empowered.
In our situation as parents the sword that we wield is our mind and emotions
Of course the body is important too
because we need the physical energy necessary
to keep up with our kids!
But it is the mind and emotions
that we must pay the most close attention to.
Sharpen your sword with meditation
One of the best ways that we can
sharpen and strengthen that tool is meditation.
Meditation calms the mind, focuses it
and helps us to be conscious in the midst of chaos.
Meditation gives us a way of perceiving our experiences
without getting totally lost in them.
Meditation helps us find the calm in the center of the storm
It also connects us to our center.
If you have ever been upset with your kids
you know that in those moments your Center is completely lost.
Because meditation is in part the act of
discovering and becoming familiar with your center,
it becomes easier to access the place of inner stability
and connection in difficult moments.
Meditation helps us connect to our children
The deeper we are able to connect with our own spirit
the more effectively we will be able to connect with our children’s spirit.
This is where connection, love and empathy come from.
Find a form of meditation that works for you
There are as many forms of meditation
as there are people walking this earth.
At the most basic level meditation can be as simple as
focusing on the breath or saying a mantra.
Meditation can also be dancing or painting,
it can be even listening to music.
There are many more complicated methods as well.
The key is to find something that feels good to you,
that attracts you and that you are able to do it consistently.
You don’t have to meditate a lot to see the positive effects
Even just a few minutes a day
can make a huge difference in the way
you operate in the world
and in the way you relate to your kids.
In case you hadn’t guessed by now I am encouraging you to meditate
I am not a meditation teacher
so I’m not going to teach you how to meditate.
I do just want to encourage you to
try a simple meditation on a regular basis.
I will talk more about meditation and mindfulness in future blogs.
I will go into more detail on how
the spiritual component of our lives plays into parenting.
Share your own meditation parenting experiences
If you have any experiences with
meditation and parenting I’d love to hear about them.
Feel free to share it in the comments below
or you can also email me from the contact page.